If you know me, you know that I’m obviously cultured. Take, for instance, my appreciation for Merle Haggard. Haggard was the poet of the working man. You don’t just listen to his songs; you are dragged into them. For some, Merle is an acquired taste. If you don’t like him, I suggest you get some taste. I saw him in concert several times while I was in high school. While everyone else was excited about the latest ear-splitting leather-clad screamer…I saved up my money to go see Merle and possibly the most talented group of musicians in country music history, The Strangers, play in person. One night I remember sneaking back behind the stage and talking to Haggard’s horn player. I was in high cotton.
One of his many hits was the song “The Way I Am.” In it, he sings, “Wish I enjoyed what makes my living, Did what I do with a willin’ hand, Some would run, but that ain’t like me, So I just dream and keep on bein’ the way I am.” That’s strong. Songwriter Townes Van Zandt said there were two types of songs: zippity do dah songs and the blues. Haggard didn’t sing too many zippity do dah songs.
That notion of “that’s just the way I am” carries over to many aspects of our lives.
Have you ever heard these (or said these)?
“I have a temper…that’s just the way I am.”
“I speak my mind…that’s just the way I am.” (Remember, an empty wagon makes the most noise.)
“I don’t forgive easily…that’s just the way I am.”
“My dad was like this…that’s just the way I am.”
“I grew up thinking that about “those” people…that’s just the way I am.”
“I’m not going to change at my age…that’s just the way I am.”
We don’t have to become someone we are not. But many times these “that’s just the way I am” statements are just excuses. We are the way we are…because we want to be that way. We get angry because we like it. We say things that are hurtful because we like it. We don’t like forgiving people. We act like Dad because it’s easier than changing. We treat people differently because we choose to and like to feel superior.
Not everything handed down to us from the previous generation is right. Pharmacies used to sell cigarettes that were advertised to help with asthma…doctors used to use leeches…and babies were given opium to help them sleep. Just because something is the way it’s always been doesn’t mean it doesn’t need to change.
Think about those “That’s just the way I am” statements in your life. If you are honest, some come from hearts that need to repent. James 1:14 reads, “But each person is tempted when he is drawn away and enticed by his own evil desires.”
Why do we do the things we do? Because we choose to.
Yes, your dad may have had a temper. Your family may have a history of alcohol abuse. You may come from a family where speaking your mind (when silence might be the better option) is promoted.
Don’t do things that will hurt your testimony…because “That’s just the way I am.”
Change.
God indeed accepts us as we are…but He loves us too much to leave us there. There are things in our past that we have no control over. We all have things in life we didn’t choose. But we can choose who we will become and how we will behave.
Break the cycle in your family. Become a positive example for those who follow you.
Sing it, Merle…
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